| You know what? You can not count on anyfuckingbody in this world. And I don't want any fucking comments from you sunshine and roses fuckers telling me that everything is going to be ok, blah blah blah bullshit. Because I've been there, done that. I used to be optimistic and happy and think there was something good waiting for me around the corner. But you know what? There is not. I am the only one living in my fucking shoes, so don't talk to me like you know me, like things will somehow, magically get better, that people will suddenly stop letting me down, because it ain't gonna fuckin' happen. I've always believed that we all make our happiness, I've never relied on anyone else for my happiness. But when everyone around me keeps letting me down in small ways and big, it gets harder and harder to have a positive outlook on life. What is there to be positive about when I can not rely on anyone but myself?
Don't answer that. Just do me a better favor and think about this: Next time you think your actions aren't going to affect somebody, think again; next time you don't call someone because you don't think they care, think again; next time you dis someone and don't bother to apologize, think again; next time you neglect to tell someone how much they mean to you, think again; next time you leave someone out because you are being selfish, think again. Think about every fucking thing you do or don't do, say or don't say and how it may or may not affect someone in a positive or negative way. Call me over-sensitive, but you know what, every fucking thing that people I care about do or don't do, say or don't say, affects me in one way or another. Just think about other people's feelings, that's all I ask. No matter how small the gesture is, it makes a difference in someone's life. Believe or not, it's true.
It's been 2 days since my last cigarette.
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