| Things at my job that make me want to crack skulls (haha I said crack skulls, if you don't know what movie that is referencing then you are WAY too young to be in here): [Part I] Paying Good Money to Get My Ass Chewed There is assigned parking that I pay too damn much money for, which recently has had some rearranging due to construction. I was one of the lucky one's too get reassigned and for two weeks now every spot they've assigned me too, saying the spot is open, has had other people parked in it. Three times I've been pissed enough that I've parked behind people and blocked them in because they were in my spot and I've gotten nasty notes saying that I was in their spot. Then yesterday the bitch I parked behind chewed me a new asshole. Every time I�d start to talk, she�d cut me off. I then proceeded to chew the building manager a new asshole. All the while he�s assuring me that I can park there. Things still aren�t resolved today and I still don�t have a space to park. Finally he said I could start parking in his spot, which is covered and closer (it�s the fucking least he can), because he's never there. Fine by me, asshole. Management Manners 101 The area manager is a spoiled middle-aged man. This is his world and we just living in it, people. He's from India and he's even told us, on several occasions, that his name in Indian means "Prince." Oh gag me. He is the typical man-in-management who deems everything a fucking crisis when it's happening to him, but when we need something urgent it sits on his desk for days. My office is right around the corner from his and the secretary is right around the corner from me. So he's maybe thirty feet away from the secretary. Whenever he needs something, he yells for her. No, he does not pick up his phone and buzz her. No, he does not get off his ass and go speak to her politely. He YELLS her name for the entire world to hear and then yells his request. If she doesn't respond, he yells her name like three times and then comes out of his office all frantic-like asking if anyone's seen her. If she leaves the office for lunch and he happens to be there, he practically goes into cardiac arrest. Exorcist or Pamprin? Everyone in my office is pretty friendly. Of course there is that one crazy person. But my crazy co-worker has a way of being crazy that makes her seem almost not crazy. She's got like freaky brainpower over people sometimes. One day you will see her and she's all motherly, smiley and friendly and willing to help you anyway she can. The next day she�s like possessed by demons, practically growling when someone asks her a question and her eyes get all beady. And I swear if you get her in the right light they turn red. She's pretty scary when she's like that, so I try not to bother her if at all possible. The Shoe Scuffer There is one guy who's hardly ever there. When he is there, I hardly ever see him. But I always know when he's coming in my direction because he walks at the pace of a snail and he drags his feet, scuffing them all the way down the hall. We have carpeted floors, so I think that makes it louder. It's one of those things that just grates on your nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard. I want to run out of the office screaming, "Mommy, make it stop!" and covering my ears like a psych patient every time I hear him coming. Actually I want to do that every time anything irritates me. But I guess I have good self-control. Or something.
It's been 58 days since my last cigarette.
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