| My pal Jaime mentioned something about wearing granny underwear one time and it got me to thinking. No, not about her saggy-butted underwear, which I'm sure are totally adorable. But about this whole g-string phenomenon. I've given this a lot of thought and I've come to the conclusion that the only reason women wear g-strings is for men. And that makes me want to vomit. Before you go off on me, finish reading. "But, no no no, you are so wrong," says half my friends and all the hoochies out there, "we wear them because they are comfortable and because they don't show a panty line and because they make us feel sexy and because they are so much cuter than regular underwear!" Well I think you are kidding yourselves and I'll tell you why. First of all, answer me this. If every single man was wiped from this planet, would you still wear your g-string or are you telling me that a string of polyester shoved up your ass crack is really THAT comfortable? Secondly, if you don't want a panty line to show, why not just go commando? If you don't feel comfortable going commando, then why not wear a pair of those suctioning biker shorts underwear? Have you ever tried them? Damn, they are comfy! Personally, I prefer commando to underwear jammed up my asshole, but hey, to each her own. Thirdly, why do g-strings make you feel sexy? Because every fucking male designer in this world tells you through advertising and movies that separating your ass cheeks with a piece of cotton is sexy? Or is is because you are turned on by your underwear stimulating your asshole all day? If you need to get off that bad, just go buy a fucking dildo. Fourthly, I think our society has completely blurred the lines between what is sexy and what is slutty. Personally I see a big difference. For instance, Girls Gone Wild (if you don't know what this is, don't worry, you aren't missing anything) is the most retarded, unsexy display of human degenerates to every hit reality television. Not to mention the fact that these sluts only do this for the attention of men. I don't understand how women can be so desperate for attention that they are willing to totally and completely degrade themselves. Now-a-days, the image of sexy is slutty, for the most part. If you aren't showing your cleavage or your buttcrack or your happy trail, then you aren't sexy. I mean, what ever happened to leaving a little something to the imagination? And why is it cool to dress in a way that you know damn well makes men want to fuck you? Is that the perception that you want to give? Personally, I don't want to be seen as a piece of meat, but like I said before, to each her own. But I'm getting off the subject here. I am NOT saying that you are a slut if you wear g-strings. Finally, I would just like to point out that I have read in several different articles than g-strings can perpetuate urinary tract infections. This next part is kind of sick, so some of you might want to skip it. They say that the bacteria from your ass basically gets trapped on the string and seeps down into your crotch. Now if that is not a reason to stop the g-string madness, then I don't know what is. The reality is, I couldn't care less what kind of underwear people wear. I have my preferences and other people have theirs. But what I do care about is women buying into these ideas of what is sexy and letting other people dictate how they perceive themselves. I'm tired of women not doing what they want or not wearing what is comfortable, all because society keeps trying to force us into a tiny little box, that most of us quite literally, can not fit into.
It's been 20 days since my last cigarette.
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